9/10/10

What I need a heaping help of...

What I need a heaping help of is fantasy. Not just in my head because I know there is no lack of fantasy in my mind, what I really need is someone to fantasize with. Some one who will play along with me, indulge my wicked fetish to be wanted needed longed for and maybe even loved even if it is just role play-


When I arrive at his home I will be shy and nervous, not my usual brassy self. It has been so long since I have served or been used I feel so broken my nerves are wrecked. He wants me, he has said so and I know he means it as much he can. I spoke to him tonight and will be going to my bed dreaming of next week when I will come to him ready to play and be played with. I will enter and enchant his pets finding a seat where he can sit with me, near me his eager energy will overwhelm me. His welcome warm, his skin warm under my cool hands, my breath warm on his pale throat.

I was bold on the phone, begging for affection, attention some kind of affirmation. Hearing about how often he has thought of me, even how he likes to remember me from the play parties and that I have a sweet giggle, which made me giggle more. I told him I liked the feel of his long soft hair wrapped in my hand, I liked the deep passionate kisses and even more I loved the taste of his neck when his pulse is wild. I forgot to tell him how much I adore the feel and sight of his cock against his blue jeans so clearly aroused for me, so clearly hard pressing against the rough material straining against the unnatural constraint of clothing when faced with me in a state of bliss determined to torture and arouse him.

That is what I am craving his long hard angles against my soft full curves. Being held by someone as though I were a prize to be cherished not just a passing fancy. I do not mean to give such weight to what I am sure is meant to be a casual encounter and that might be part of why I have been avoiding casual encounters for fear I will be giving them more weight then they deserve. Since I know that is unfair for whoever I happen to try and partner with so I have to make sure everybody is clear to play along, that is part of what is so wonderful about this fantasy it is what makes me so eager to go play he is willing to do what ever I need so I can feel better. Even if that means I just need to use him and submit to his will and feed on his emotions and run away before it feels real-